SO no baby yet.
This week has been a roller coaster of emotion.
Wednesday morning I woke up with intense contractions that went about ten times an hour from 3:30 am until about 9ish I think.
Then they stopped...basically completely.
Lots of pelvic pressure throughout the day. And other labor signs, but those illusive labor contractions were not to be found.
We had friends watch the kids because we thought that the labor would probably start back up....
...and it did Thursday morning, full throttle.
Again super intense, building contractions that began around 5:30ish this time and lasted until just about 11. Midwives came over around 6am, and I progressed a TON. When the contractions tapered off I was at just over a 6 in dilation(dilation is really overrated in my experience). So the midwives thought they should leave to see if me resting would get everything going again. The contractions had started to taper around 10ish and we had already tried a ton of things to get them going again. Rest seemed like what my body was wanting.
I had maybe four more contractions throughout the rest of Thursday. Lots of other labor symptoms(consistent bloody show, pelvic pressure to the max, etc...)
But again those elusive labor contractions were seriously lacking.
There was much talked of hope for a night labor as soon as the kids were asleep in bed. The kids were completely wiped out from playing for a day and a half with friends and being away from home. Hope was high that if labor started they would sleep through the night. It took like no minutes for ME to fall asleep as these last few days have been emotionally draining TO THE MAX. I figured, with everyone else, that labor would start up again in the morning.
Well, it is almost 9am, and no labor. My midwife is leaving town today(she has a back up), and my parents are still in town(but leave on Monday).
I am dilating, I am having all sorts of labor symptoms, just this baby isn't ready to come yet.
And apart from being uncomfortable to the max, and worrying about my parents having to leave town, and my midwife leaving town and having to have this baby with a midwife I have never met, I am ok that this baby wants to come when SHE wants to.
Sometimes you need to induce a baby. Alice was that way. But I am healthy, this baby is healthy(she is moving lots and her heartbeat is super strong:), it feels selfish to MAKE her come if she isn't ready. Which sounds really harsh and very contrary to public opinion, but there it is. She is not a "bad baby" for wanting to come when she is ready. For goodness sakes!
I am tired. I am very tired. Waiting is hard. But you know what? That is life. Sometimes you have to wait. Sometimes you have to give up your control to God. I am glad I get that. It is not easy giving up control. NOT EASY AT ALL FOR ME. But it is important to be able to do that. I can not see the future, but HE can. Everyone is safe, there is no REAL need to be freaking out about the progress of this labor.
Anyways, today will be another hard day, but it will be ok with lots of peaceful moments just like the rest of the week. Heidi Rosalind is coming. I don't know when. I have had SO MANY blessings about this birth and they have all been so encouraging and amazing. This birth is going to be exactly perfect for this baby and for me and for our family.
We have been so blessed with support from friends and family. WE ARE SO GRATEFUL. We will try and keep everyone informed as things continue to progress.(And they ARE progressing, just super slowly:).
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