Did you know they make treadmills for Willow Tree figurines? Me either.:)

IMPORTANT BACKGROUND INFO:  THIS is a Willow Tree figurine.  You have probably seen them before.

Now for the real point of this post.

YOU KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN WATCHING TOO MUCH BIGGEST LOSER WHEN, WHILE SHOPPING FOR WILLOW TREE FIGURINES, YOU MISTAKE THE FOLLOWING FOR A TREADMILL ACCESSORY FOR YOUR WILLOW TREE ORNAMENT.

It is actually just a picture stand for one of the willow tree plaques....:)


TRUE STORY.:)

BONUS POST: A MILLION DOLLARS

When BJ proposed to me he wrote me a song.  These are the lyrics.:)

Marry Me

By Bernhard Johann Hamaker

You’re not a fool to pick me out of the blue

I’m an alright guy

But I’m telling you

I’m not the Adonis seen in your eyes

When you look at me I could swear you think you’re looking at He-Man

<humble pause where I giggle>

So when I get a rest

Put your head on my chest and sigh

It’s been good so far and I can tell you

That the future’s bright

But I think we both know

That dreams don’t just work out overnight

You know, I bet you believe that I’m gonna make a mill-i-on dollars

(Maybe I will.)

But until that time

Press your sweet lips to mine and kiss me

All your waiting for me, Dear, with bated breath is sure to come

To a fabulous end

We’re both thinking, “finally, we can experiment on our chemistry”

Since we’re together again

(It’s so good to be with you!)

So we’re free from now to do as we please

Within reason, Dear

And I’ve told you my goal

To fulfill by the end of the year

If I could make a request for your assistance and collaboration

Dress up like a princess

Please put on a white dress

And marry me

It is an AWESOME song in person.:) 

So in one line of those awesome lyrics BJ mentions that I think he is going to make a million dollars.

And I really do think he will someday. When a dude graduates high school at the age of twelve I really do think that is a sign he is meant for greatness, or at least that he is smart enough to make a million dollars at some point...:) And since BJ totally fits that bill I think he will someday.

In fact I have a framed contract that we made a few years ago that states that if he ever does make a million dollars he has to take me to Paris for a shopping spree....that includes at least one super sparkly item.;)

It is such a fun thing to think about....making a million dollars.  Even if it never happens.

Lately our answer to that awesome question(WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU HAD A SPARE MILL?) has been:

1.We would use the first quarter million to pay off debt and then take our kids on an epic road trip of the USA.  50 states in 52 weeks(obviously we would take a cruise to Hawaii and Alaska...<---notice I didn't say FLY, cruises are WAY more fun!:).  I should write a post just about this dream vacation.  The plans I have made are entirely epic and AWESOME!:)

2.We would take the second quarter mill and probably buy a house in Provo. Buying a house in Provo just has always seemed like a sweet investment.:) Plus I gotta finish school, and BJ wants to go back to school as well.  Might as well stay in my favorite college town for that!:) We could always sell it after that or rent it out when we were done.:)

3.The second half of the mill would be spent on education and savings and probably some philanthropy.:)

QUESTION: WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A SPARE MILL?:)

Showers of revelation!

I have the most ear splitting headache this morning, we will see how this post goes....
(My children NEED to get out of this house! BJ has the car from now on in case I go into labor...good idea, but it sure leaves me feeling like we can't get out!)

Yesterday I wrote about how I woke up and had some personal revelation about some things I had been worrying about and praying about the night before.  Well, I thought that was pretty awesome, and figured that that filled my personal revelation quota for the day. NOT SO! ALL DAY LONG I had promptings from the spirit about what to do for JANE'S schooling this coming year(and Denny and Alice's as well;).  I think I was on the internet for five hours straight(well, with tiny kid interruptions throughout...silly people need to eat or something!:). 

I thought we had made our decision about what kind of schooling to do for Jane, but I hadn't really felt a spiritual confirmation about it yet.  In fact, I felt pretty cold about it, but logically it felt good.  Sometimes you just need to make a decision and act on it before Heavenly Father will tell you if He thinks you are on the right path. So that is what we were banking on...

Yesterday I wasn't even thinking about Jane's schooling(except that we needed to make sure the rest of her paperwork was in).  I was mostly still on a high about MY school plans.:)  And I was also thinking a lot about the book BJ and I have been reading at night...which made me think about the author and how much I love Dorothy L. Sayers as a person.  Which led me to look her up for the millionth time on Wikipedia.  WHICH led me to this AMAZING essay on education that she wrote. THE LOST TOOLS OF LEARNING. AMAZING article, and so worth the read!:)

ANYWAYS, THAT article led me to think about some other things, which led me to think about what my goals are for my childrens' educations. The program we were signing Jane up for just didn't seem to fit exactly. SO, thus the next five hours of serious research and internal reflection on what the heck I wanted to give my children as far as a learning experience in this life.  I really want them prepared for university of course, but I want more than that.  I want them to be people of strong character and mind.  I want them to be positive, proactive, problem solvers.  I want them to have a liberal arts education.<----This has always been what I consider the best education.  A broad spectrum, but with purpose of educating the mind towards truth and beauty and proactiveness in the world.  I want religion to be a part of my childrens' education-a really unpopular thought at the moment for most of the world, but something I feel is important.  Christian values. SO IMPORTANT. 

Sufficeth to say I have found a new program I love.  I can't explain why I chose this one over lots of others in a really convincing, logical argument, but I do know that when I look at the curriculum the spirit tells me that this is what MY children need to prepare them for their own unique missions in life.:)  That is important to me.  I really believe we are all here for a unique purpose, and our education can have a huge and vital role in preparing us for that mission.:)

So, I thought, WOW! LOT'S of revelation today! I am full!

AND THEN MORE CAME....this time to BJ.

He was doing some super late night shopping(yeah, ran out of chocolate cereal and milk AGAIN), and in the middle of some random thought the Lord stopped him in his tracks and started telling him a very specific list of things to do.  It was incredible! Some of it was too technical for me to understand, but the gist was that Heavenly Father gave BJ a to-do list to set up the internet marketing business he has been wanting to set up for the last while.  BIG STEP!  He isn't going to quit his current job or anything(yet;)), but it was a really exciting late night as everything he needed fell into place to get things started.

A WHOLE DAY OF PERSONAL REVELATION FOR THE BJHAMAKERS!!!

I told BJ that I was so excited about the future, but so confused about why this all happened in one day.  I hadn't felt like I was doing anything out of the ordinary, like spiritual wise.  I had been trying harder to read the scriptures daily and just really get through the day without too much craziness, but nothing big.
I read an article the other day about how we confuse perfection with worthiness, and I think I do that sometimes.  You don't have to be perfect for God to bless you.  Just doing your best.:)

Heavenly Father loves us so much.  He is right there waiting to bless us in overflowing blessing ways.:)  Life has been a really ginormous struggle for our family in the last 7 years, and it feels so weird to start feeling like good things are starting to happen really consistently.  It is scary a bit.  Is Clair allowed to live her dreams? I know other people can and do, but can *I*?  Is that OK?  Can I live the life I have dreamt of for FOREVER with my family? 

Anyways, it was the craziest day yesterday, and it was AWESOME.  It used to be that we were holding on for dear life cause life was horrible, now it feels like Heavenly Father is starting to pick up the pace in the other direction and we are holding on for dear life cause life is awesome and crazy and wonderful!!!

Whatever your circumstances, I hope your Wednesday is blessed and full of hope for the future!  Heavenly Father has a plan for you, you know.:)  Sometimes it takes a long time for it to be revealed, and even then, sometimes it is revealed only in bits at a time, but there IS a plan for you, and your future is more glorious than you could know.:)

BONUS POST: CONTEST AND PRIZE!!

Hey! I just realized that with the baby coming any day(or week....:)now, that it would be super opportune to have a contest and giveaway!

SO! Here it goes:

CONTEST!!!!  Guess when this baby girl is gonna make her appearence, put the date down there in the comments and if you are right then you win! I think in honor of my recent educational pursuits the prize will be a Barnes and Nobles gift card! I do not love that store, in fact, everytime I go there I just go straight to the info desk and ask where my book is.  It is SO DISORGANIZED THERE! But I digress....anyways, go ahead and guess!  Here is perhaps some helpful info, her blessing date has been set for the 12th of August, so hopefully she will be born by then.<---in case you need some kind of due date for reference....:)

RANDOM NOTE: This is the book BJ is reading to me lately.  It is, in my opinion, Dorothy L. Sayer's BEST work of detective fiction.:)  It is best after you read the first three Lord Peter and Harriet Vane books, and I must warn it has a bit of scandal(it takes place on their honeymoon, but let me tell you, it is TAME and way more ginormously appropriate compared to nasty TWILIGHT.:). WHAT I LOVE about this particular work is how Dorothy L. Sayers is so BRILLIANT in character revelation.  It can't even be called character development.  It is really character revelation.  The way she REVEALS the innards of her characters is AMAZING(and I am not talking about the murder mystery part;).  So much truth about human nature is contained here.  Such a good read.:) Random, but I will end this post with this favorite book.:)

As BJ and I used to maxim, "The Future is Bright!" and all is right in heaven.:)

Yesterday planning out my university schedule was AWESOME.  I am so excited about expanding my education and FINISHING my degree!!!  It is going to take me just over four years to finish.  That is a really long time.  But in retrospect, that is shorter than it is taking me to finish my Master Herbalist course.:)

It is really expensive to go to school.  BYU is BY FAR one of the more affordable universities in the country. Education is really important to the LDS church and I am so grateful because they try to make it as affordable as possible.:) But it is still more than...FREE...:)

It is also, like I mentioned above, REALLY time consuming.

SO MONEY AND TIME.  The BJHamaker family has really struggled with those two things. Yesterday whilst looking at the schedule I had made for myself I pondered FOR SEVERAL HOURS seriously on if this was the right time and WORTH it.  I drove BJ crazy by asking him for the millionth time if it was OK to be planning on my doing this.  And what I really meant was, is it right?  Is it responsible?  Is it appropriate when we have so many darling babies to look out for and take care of?  Talk about time and money, babies use them up like nothing else!:)

I have been praying to know what Heavenly Father thinks about my plans as well.  I want to be a good Mum, and that was a huge part of what I told Heavenly Father whilst telling Him about everything else. And I really want to be a good wife and support to my husband.  I have been so chronically sick for so many years, and he has had to spend SO MUCH of his energy taking care of me and the kids and everything by himself that it feels so selfish in a way to want these next four years to go to school.  It doesn't feel like a NEED.  Like in a survival way. But the truth is, finishing school IS a need for Clair.  I NEED it.  Not every person needs to finish school, but I do.  Learning is part of who I am.  I am really good at learning on my own as well, but a formal education is definitely a part of what makes a Clair a good Clair.

Last night I went to bed feeling good about the plans, but still a bit worried about the rightness of my choices. This morning I woke up and Heavenly Father blessed me with inspiration and personal revelation.  He put in my mind all the ways that my choices were going to make me an even BETTER Mum than if I chose not to go back to school.  He took me through the classes I have chosen and showed how each one would make me a better person and mother.  I am SO GRATEFUL!  What a loving Heavenly Father we have!  He didn't have to do that.  He could have just let me wait and see for myself whether or not the choices I am making are good just by their natural consequences, but He chose to tell me and show me in my mind well before hand instead. 

I have such a strong testimony of personal revelation as it pertains to our lives in not just spiritual ways.  Heavenly Father cares about us so much.  He cares about our feelings and what goes on in our days.  He cares about our families and how they are progressing and what they need.

I am SO excited for school.  It is going to be a CRAZY four years, and there is still planning and organizing to do.  One big thing that needs to happen this Autumn is recovering from this pregnancy and getting as healthy as I have never been!:)  I am telling you herbs and nutrition and taking care of my body are going to be super keys in making this university experience happen!:)  Energy without the coffee and energy drinks of the normal world, it is TOTALLY possible dudes.:)

Anyways, I hope you are having a lovely Tuesday! This week has been a super challenge already here, and the pressure that has been mounting in my lower back and pelvic area convinces me these last few days(or dare I even say it...weeks?!?!??!) are going to be an act of endurance to the max...

Cheers!

BONUS POST:Monday saved!

Turns out a way to get yourself out of a horrible emotional slump of a day is to:

1.Watch a NEW fun movie with your kiddos.
2.Make sure they have crayons.
(DUDE, crayons, scissors, paper, and costumes-the fourth item is not related to the first three items- are NEEDS in this family:)
3.Make a master plan for all my classes at BYU.:) Slow but steady is gonna have to win the race, and lets be perfectly honest...we will probably have another baby or two before I graduate.:) 

Lesson of today. To get out of a slump pray for a twinkle of hope for the future and peace for the present.

*****BJ, I am still handing the kids over to you ASAP when you get home, and please make me some healthy food....:)

Happy Monday!

The first horrible Monday in forever. There is a blessing somewhere in that statement.;)

I HATE wishing the days away.
I feel like this earth experience is such a blessing and everyday is so precious.
BUT
If this week could speed by at Godspeed, I would be really grateful.
It hasn't felt like HORRIBLE MONDAY in years.
Today it is definitely horrible.
I am tired.
I am in pain.
I have nothing to give my children.
They are watching Nanny McPhee which will probably give them all sorts of naughty ideas.
I am really over the watching movies all day everyday...like to the forever max.
I have been sitting here trying to think about how to make today better.
Prayer and scripture have been happening already, but I think today is just meant to be difficult.
Really, I think the truth is is that I need a nap to the max.
Dare I tempt the fates and take one?
Friday, come quickly PLEASE.
Make that Friday evening.
(then BJ will be home for the weekend again;)
I wish there was prenatal paternity leave....:)

QUESTION: What fun things are YOU doing this week?:)